"How to hug a porcupine"


Tonight I got into argument # 3,469,802 (approximately) with the beautiful child that god has given me.  {Can you hear me sigh from your side of the computer?}I was emotionally exhausted, frustrated and at the end of this particular rope.  Fortunately, God graciously has given me a new rope.  My sweet hubby and I had the blessed opportunity to go to a fireside to hear the speaker Dr. John L. Lund…he is a motivational speaker/family therapist/mediator, and more.  We arrived late as the previous argument with my beautiful child had bled over into our ‘leaving time’.  I was stressed, exhausted and on the verge of crying and the first thing I heard Dr. Lund say was that we need to take our frustrations to the Lord and Love our loved ones.  He then proceeded to talk about the importance of avoiding criticism and fault finding.  He was talking to me!!!  It’s very easy for me to get frustrated and then let my tongue express my frustration in all it’s vitriolic extremity.  But, what does that do for me?  for my beautiful child?  NOTHING!!!  Dr. Lund referenced a talk by President Gordon B. Hinkley *our Prophet in the LDS church titled “The Lord is at the helm ” (check out the video here).  Which among a lot of other things reminds us of the importance of being positive, refraining from being critical or harsh.  I read it as soon as I got home and it is a good one.  Dr. Lund mentioned a challenge called the 24 hour challenge.  It is to have 0 criticisms of anyone or anything for 24 hours.  I am considering taking on his challenge.  He also referenced Doctrine & Covenants section 121: 41 which states “No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned.”  I definitely think I fall into the long-suffering category so I must also need the gentleness and meekness part. It was a lovely evening.  Very soul repairing for me.  So, here I am back at home with beautiful child of mine exercising my parenting skills while trying to reign in my critical skills.  Good luck to me!

Man.  Teenagers are tough!  And, just in case you’re wondering….the porcupine is the teenager.  Dr. Lund has a book titled “How to hug a porcupine”.  I think I may need to check it out!


One response »

  1. I want to buy some of Dr. Lund's tapes and lend them out to everyone who didn't make it to the fireside! It was excellent! All the best to you as you apply what he said. We all needed to hear it.

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